The Top 5 Jealous Behaviors That Are Dating Deal Breakers
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This weekend I watched “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days” and it reminded me of all the relationship no-no’s that a person can commit. Personally, I think the most offensive behavior is irrational jealousy. Here are the top five jealous behaviors that would be dating deal breakers for me.
1. Over-reaction Jealousy- While a little jealous behavior, i.e. an arm wrapped around me when you realize someone is checking me out, is a nice ego boost, it’s important to remember that anything more will cause me to think you’re obsessive. If my partner is jealous of me spending time with my friends, male or female, well, that’s a deal breaker.
2. Too much “Us Time”- “Us Time” is a concept that comes from a well-intentioned place, but the outcome from this common dating fix-it is usually messy. It is generally a stopgap measure taken by one partner in order to try to help battle the other person’s feelings of insecurity in the relationship. It’s important for a couple to keep their own hobbies and to hang out with their own friends to preserve their personal identity- I was an individual before you and I became a “we” and that shouldn’t change.
3. Digital Stalking- This is one of the biggest relationship no-nos out there today. There is no reason to check my cell phone to see who I’m talking to and how often. Obsessive texting and/or calling me when I’m out with friends is also a problem. If I’m considerate enough to tell you what my plans are for the evening, be the cool boyfriend and let me have a good night out. I will you miss a lot more if you’re not constantly interfering with my night out with my friends. This is a two-way street.
4. Internet Stalking- Technology makes it so easy to find out what I’m doing when you’re not around. Checking my Facebook/Myspace page 15 times a day screams desperation and who wants to be seen as desperate? Another important thing to keep in mind is when, or if, to “friend” my friends. It is ill-advised to ask my best friend to be your “friend” when it’s obvious that you dislike him or her. You know it, they know it, and it could potentially lead to a rift between you and I.
5. Pouting- I’ve seen this many times when my guy friends talk to me when their girlfriends are around. Girls, you are strong, independent women who should be with a man because you want to be, not because you need to be, so that’s not ruin that by giving yourself unnecessary wrinkles, okay? And, men, if you pout, well, I just can’t deal with that in a man. Pouting is unattractive in anyone over the age of five.
If you’re jealous because you don’t trust your partner and you have a good reason for not trusting him or her, get out now. Trust is essential to a relationship. If you’re jealous for no reason, you need to figure out what in your past is making you behave this way. Either way you need to do some soul-searching and make a choice concerning your relationship.