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I don’t want to come right out and say something embarrassing like I constantly compare my life to a movie musical. I mean, that just sounds silly, right? (Then again, I need something to think about while I’m out and about in the world and everyone else is playing on their iphones as I manage with a prehistoric 2009 phone that I don’t even use to access the internet.)
But in my personal movie musical, I imagine a big opening number where the screen gets divided into several portions- like the airport hugs collage in Love Actually, and each little square contains someone updating their facebook status instead of telling people how their day was in person. And then my square lights up — Cue the wistful, but driven ballad from a girl who has more to say than will fit into a status box.
All muss, no fuss.
It’s basically a recipe for disaster, but I have never met a bartender (well, a male bartender) I didn’t like.
Is there a place for you in your life? Think about that, if you’ve got a handful of minutes. Now take my flashlight.
“I’m fine,” I told her. And I was.
Tina nodded her approval and everyone moved on. I cried less. And no one even needed to ask if I was okay, but if they did, I knew the correct answer.
Gradually, though, I made it my mantra- calling on those two little words as a default- particularly when they weren’t true.
They led me through several situations, where I gritted my teeth and told no anything other than “I’m fine.”
Even in my late twenties I catch myself falling back on what I know and expecting to be warded off at the slightest hint of vulnerability. “I’m fine,” I say, no matter what is really going on.
I can’t help but look back and see how I would have been spared from several negative ongoing situations if I hadn’t felt it necessary to be “fine” in the public eye. I’d go into it, but I also prefer not to be seen as bitter as well.
…As a small oral surgery temporarily impaired the ease of flashing my pearly whites, I find that I seem to give off a pessimistic impression to everyone I meet.
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If I have so many choices, than why the hell does this box feel like it’s getting smaller and smaller?
It’s time to bust out.
Loving every part of ourselves is easier said than done. I recently saw the film, “Eat Pray Love” and it brought something very important to my attention. Not only the importance of self love, …